Ever had that neighbor who seemed totally normal until they… weren’t? That’s Lori Vallow in a nutshell, except her version of “not normal” escalated to apocalyptic beliefs and multiple murders. Talk about a homeowner’s association nightmare.
I’ve been obsessed with this case since the children first disappeared. (I’ve consumed so much content on Lori Vallow that my husband Ryan now sighs dramatically whenever I mention her name. “Is this dinner conversation really necessary?” Yes, Ryan. Yes it is.)
The “Before” Picture: Just Your Average Mom
Born in 1973 in sunny California, Lori Norene Cox started out like many women – marriage, kids, church on Sundays. Nothing in her early years screamed “future doomsday mom.” She was raised Mormon, had a seemingly normal childhood, and cycled through several marriages like they were seasonal wardrobes.
Her relationship with her second husband, Joseph Ryan (Tylee’s father), was particularly contentious. They fought bitterly over custody, and – red flag alert – her brother Alex Cox once attacked Joseph with a taser. Family gatherings must have been as tense as a police interrogation room.
When Radical Religion Enters the Chat
Around 2015, Lori discovered the writings of Chad Daybell, a doomsday prepper and author of spiritually questionable Mormon fan fiction. His books were about as grounded in reality as my chances of becoming a professional figure skater at age 35.
Their fateful meeting at a “Preparing a People” conference in 2018 was basically the true crime equivalent of a meet-cute. Except instead of running into each other at a bookstore, they bonded over beliefs that people could be possessed by “dark” spirits and become “zombies.” (Not the fun Walking Dead kind – the “their souls are gone and their bodies can be disposed of” kind. Yikes on several bikes.)
This is where things go from quirky beliefs to “someone call the authorities.” Lori started claiming her children had been possessed by evil spirits. As someone who’s dealt with toddler tantrums, I understand the sentiment – but most of us just pour a glass of wine and call our moms for support.
The Disappearing Act That Shocked America
By September 2019, Tylee Ryan (16) vanished after a family trip to Yellowstone National Park. Two weeks later, her adopted brother JJ (7) also disappeared. When questioned by police, Lori had excuses smoother than a criminal lawyer on retainer – claiming JJ was staying with friends in Arizona.
Meanwhile, people around Lori kept dying under suspicious circumstances. Her fourth husband Charles Vallow? Shot by brother Alex in an alleged “self-defense” incident. Chad’s wife Tammy? Died mysteriously in her sleep. Alex Cox himself? Collapsed and died of “natural causes.” That’s more convenient deaths than an Agatha Christie novel.
While children were missing, Lori and Chad were busy getting married on a Hawaiian beach. Nothing says “I’m definitely not involved in anything suspicious” like a tropical wedding while your kids are nowhere to be found.
The bodies of Tylee and JJ were eventually discovered in June 2020, buried on Chad Daybell’s property in Idaho. I remember exactly where I was when this news broke – standing in my kitchen, phone in hand, feeling physically ill. Those poor babies.
Justice Comes Knocking (Finally)
After a legal saga that dragged on longer than my last attempt at a juice cleanse, Lori was convicted in May 2023 of first-degree murder, conspiracy to commit murder, and grand theft. She earned herself three consecutive life sentences without parole. Chad Daybell also faced justice in May 2024, convicted on all counts.
The courtroom photos of Lori show a woman who still seems to believe she did nothing wrong. Her smirks and inappropriate smiles during proceedings were as disturbing as finding a stranger’s hair in your food.
The Bigger Picture: When Belief Becomes Deadly
What makes this case so fascinating (in the darkest possible way) is how it highlights the dangerous intersection of extreme religious beliefs, possible mental illness, and criminal behavior. Lori and Chad created their own reality where murdering children was justified because they were “saving their souls.”
The case also raises serious questions about how we identify and respond to dangerous radicalization. The warning signs were there – Lori’s increasingly bizarre statements about people becoming “zombies,” her casual attitude toward her brother attacking her ex-husband, her concerning statements about death.
For a deep dive into the twisted timeline of events, the comprehensive Wikipedia page on the Vallow-Daybell murders covers everything from the initial disappearances to the final convictions.
I’ve spent countless nights poring over the details of this case, much to my husband’s chagrin. The most chilling aspect isn’t the supernatural beliefs – it’s how ordinary Lori appeared to many people around her. The complete timeline of Lori’s descent from soccer mom to convicted killer shows just how gradually someone can slide from eccentric beliefs to unthinkable violence.
If you’re wondering about the legal complexities of this case (and there are many), FindLaw’s breakdown of the Lori Vallow case provides excellent insights into the charges and convictions.
Would I have survived this? Unlike most cases I cover, I’d like to think I would have noticed something off about the charismatic couple with apocalyptic beliefs and a trail of convenient deaths behind them. But then again, hindsight in true crime is always 20/20, isn’t it?
Lock your doors tonight, friends. Sometimes the monsters look just like us.